Oh, the beautiful holiday of Halloween. Whether it’s a jumpy scarecrow while trick or treating or staying in to watch scary movies like Jeepers Creepers or Nightmare on Elm Street, it’s certainly the spookiest time of the year.
Equally as scary for the other 26 teams, I think there are only four NBA teams that can win the title this season: Golden State (obviously), Houston (if they play defense), Toronto (if they show up when it matters) and Boston. The Celtics have the best depth and can matchup with the Warriors better than anyone else in the league.
But this is a holiday of fright and anxiousness. What should each of these teams have to fear, you ask? Oh boy, do I have the most serious answers for you.
Warriors – Durant drama
Injuries would be the cop-out answer here. But the biggest thing the Warriors should fear (besides their whole starting five tearing their ACLs thanks to a Mark Jackson-looking Freddy Cougar) is if Kevin Durant starts some dumb drama on social media. Unlikely to happen, but would be epic if Durant’s slithery fingers end up being the unraveling of the best starting five ever assembled.
Rockets – Melo’s midrange
The Rockets worst nightmare might be unfolding before our eyes already, as their offseason decisions to let Trevor Ariza and Luc Mbah a Moute leave in free agency for Michael Carter-Williams and James Ennis has yielded some growing pains in return. Their defense has been okay, but their lack of shooting has hurt their style that helped so much the last couple seasons.
Speaking of shooting, the lack of it isn’t their biggest nightmare. Just imagine a league mandate demanding Carmelo Anthony must take every fourth quarter shot for the rest of the year, but only from mid-range. That’s scarier than if Chris Paul saw Rajon Rondo out during the annual Purge.
Raptors – LeBron’s Return
While a healthy version of Kawhi Leonard rising to an elite level once again is nothing new, the increased production from Kyle Lowry as a facilitator is quite impressive. The only thing that has continually stopped and scared the Raptors from reaching tangible postseason success is LeBron James.
Imagine if The King dressed up in a Wizards uniform or whatever crappy Eastern Conference team the Raptors will play in the first round of the playoffs. Drake wouldn’t know what to do with himself.
Celtics – Scary Terry
The deepest and most versatile team in the East, Boston has been reliant on young star Jayson Tatum’s scoring ability while Kyrie Irving and Gordon Hayward get back up to speed.
Boston’s small-ball versatility with players like Tatum, Irving, Hayward, Jaylen Brown and a few other guards makes them such a dangerous threat to the Warriors. Even with all that incredible depth, it’s been the play of Tatum in just his second year that’s been the most impressive.
The worst nightmare the Celtics could have involves the scariest character of them all: Scary Terry. If Rozier starts disrupting the locker room by calling everyone a “bitch” just like the Scary Terry from Rick and Morty, the depth and chemistry would leave the team and Celtics fans would be terrified.